The Sweet Stench Of Science
by BigBangBlaze
Summary: Oneshot. Kazarina's so obsessed with completing Dharak Colossus she forgets about something very important. The members of the Twelve Orders suffer the consequences. Rated T for mild swearing. R&R pretty please.


**My second fic and my first oneshot. Inspired by episode 23 and 24 of GI.**

**If this one gets some positive reviews, I might begin a series of oneshots focusing on the members of the Twelve Orders (As they have a truckload of fanfic potential, squee!)**

**First let's see whether you guys like this fic or not.**

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Bakugan. Cuz if I did, it would've had blood and guts in it! Yummy!*evil laugh***_

**Stoica: HURRY UP! I sooooo wanna see Kazarina get humiliated! Yahooooo! BWAHAHAHAHAAA! *jumps around like a hyperactive spidermonkey on crack***

**Gill: ***evil grin*

**Barodius: ***sleeping on his fancy throne thingy* zZzzzZzzzzz *snore* Yes! I've finally seized the Sacred Orb! Now the universe is mine! *drool* ZzzzzzZZzzzzz Mmmmmm,jelly donuts! ZZzzzZzz

**Me: What a freakshow! Alright, on with the randomness!**

Sweet Stench Of Science

**Starring: Kazarina**

"How long can she keep this up?" Airzel wondered

"Can't she work any faster? I'm just itching to thrash some Neathian garbage!" Stoica was completely spazzed out

"Calm down Stoica" Gill said, "Kazarina needs time to finish upgrading Exokor! When it's done we're all going to attack the Neathian forces!

"This is taking waaaaay too long!" Stoica whined rubbing his back, - "All this waiting is making my back hurt!"

"Really? Aren't you a little to young to be suffering from back pains Master?" Lythirius questioned floating up next to Stoica

"SHUT UP!" Stoica grabbed Lythirius and threw him into an ornate garbage can that was standing right next to him. With a yelp, the unfortunate lobster vanished into the diamond-encrusted dumpster.

"Aw man I'm so pissed" Stoica growled banging his head against the wall.

"If you crack the wall with your stupid head, you're dead meat!" Airzel warned

"Yeah, dead meat!" Strikeflier's voice sounded from his pocket

**KA-BLAM!**

"THAT'S IT! YOU'RE DEAD MEAT!"

**Whack! Pow! Ka-pow!**

**"ACK! OW! NOT THE BACK! NOT THE BACK! AUUUUGH! OW MY SPINE! OW MY SPLEEN! OW MY LIVER! OW MY SQUEEDLY-SKWOOCH!" **_(Cultural Reference lol)_

Meanwhile in Kazarina's lab...

"You stupid pieces of junk! Hold still! How many times have I told you that struggling only makes it worse?" The Haos Battler hissed pushing some buttons on her torture...ahem...upgrading device aka "The Fuser Of Doom"

The dismembered Battle Gear was shaking and squealing like a pig. Apparently it was malfunctioning again.

"Just give in and hold still! I need to finish this thing before the Emperor gets ang...WHAT THE HELL?""

**BLEEEAAAAUGGHH!**

One of the Battle Gears made a loud burping noise before spewing out a fountain of green goo, barely missing Kazarina.

"Eew! That's disgusting!" Kazarina shuddered, " How dare you puke on me you worthless chunk of metal?"

The Battle Gears looked, well, ...weird. For some reason their many eyes were bloodshot and twitching, their long tongues hanging out of their mouths. The great Exokor itself was gagging.

"What's going on? Why is it malfunctioning? I'll have to run a diagnostic...Maybe they're sick or something!"

**HIIIIIIIIYAAAAAAAAHHHH!**

With an earwrenching crack the lab's door broke off its hinges and crashed into the opposite wall. A blue blur dashed past Kazarina and, unable to stop himself, crashed headfirst into a metal pillar.

"...S...Stoica?* Kazarina's jaw dropped

In the doorway stood a battered and very angry, Airzel. Next to him was Strikeflier in ball form armed with a pair of forceps.

"What the hell are you guys doing here?"

Stoica strugggled up to his feet. Aside from a melon-sized bump on his head he was also missing both his fangs and had two black eyes.

"Ka-..tha...lina, fhen ale thou hoing tho phinish thour froject" He mumbled, stars spinning around his head. Suddenly, his jaw bump on his head changed color from blue to green. Next to him Airzel turned dark green and pressed his hand against his nose.

"What's the matter? What's wrong with you?" Kazarina growled

"Thou schtink Kathaleena!" Stoica choked out

" When was the last time you took a bath?" Airzel asked fighting back nausea

"WTF? I stink? I STINK? There's no way! I never stink! NEVAAAAAAH!" Kazarina screamed in denial

Meanwhile both green Gundalians started turning purple.

"LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!" Airzel shrieked dashing out of the lab, followed by Stoica.

Little they knew that at precisely the same time Emperor Barodius was walking through the hall.

**BLAM!**

They tumbled down the straircase, knocking Gill down in the process along with a plantpot with a man-eating plant (Barodius' favorite carnivorous cactus) and finally landed with a thud.

Airzel had a black eye, Gill's head was half swallowed by the cactus, Stoica had a thorn in his butt and the Emperor survived without any major injuries. But he was mad as hell.

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?" He shrieked, making the gang of beaten up Gundalians shiver.

"em...Uh...Em-Emperor...Kazarina s-s-s" Airzel stammered

"Yes, spit it out!"

" OH YOUR HIGHNESS! PLEASE FORGIVE US!DON'T ERASE US FROM EXISTENCE!" Airzel begged

" It's just that..We have trouble! Kazarina.."

"What is it?"

"OH PLEASE YOUR OMNIPOTENCE, WE BEG OF YOU, PLEASE ORDER KAZARINA TO TAKE A BATH FOR GOD'S SAKE!" They all begged in unison, anime tears streaming down their faces.

"A...Bath?" Barodius was confused

"She's been working for days and it seems that she hasn't taken a single damn shower since our last attempt to breach the second shield!"

"Is it really that serious?" Barodius sweatdropped

Stoica and Airzel nodded.

Cursing under his breath, Barodius rushed upstairs to check on Kazarina.

"Wait for it..." Stoica chuckled mischeviously," Wait for it,"

"AAAAAAAAAAARGGGGGH!"

With a terrifying yell the fair Emperor fell down the stairs and landed on his royal noggin.

"It's horrible...Horrible!" He muttered, his face sickly green and his eyes bloodshot.

Stoica roared with laughter. Gill turned to him, channeling electricity in the palm of his hand.

"Eh...It's just a cold..." He squeaked and then started faking a cough

Meanwhile the Emperor recovered from his stink poisoning.

"GUARDS! SEIZE KAZARINA!" He yelled. A troop of armored roid monkeys flooded the hallway, ready to obey their leader.

"YES SIR BARODIUS SIR!" They yelled out and ran to the lab, but not before saluting the Emperor.

"OH, AND DON'T KILL HER...yet...JUST MAKE HER TAKE A GODDAMN BATH!" Barodius added

"Wait a second your omnipotence!," Gill said, "We could use Kazarina to overpower the Neathian forces!"

"Really? How?" Barodius was intrigued

"Listen closely, Emperor-san..."

**Five hours later...**

"Soldiers of Gundalia!" Gill announced through his gasmask, "Today we're finally gonna crush the Neathians once and for all!"

The crowd cheered.

"I present...The ultimate weapon that will lead us to victory! **THE STINK-A-MAJIG!...Um...OF DOOM!" **

In front of the Gundalian troops stood a giant tube-like machine. Inside Kazarina was floating in some sort of green goo (Later she found out that the Gundalians used Exokor's barf, and she wasn't pleased at all). On top of the machine was a huge shower-like hose.

"LONG LIVE THE EMPEROR! LONG LIVE THE EMPEROR! LONG LIVE THE EMPEROR!" the soldiers cheered

"Hey is that Kazarina?" One of the soldiers asked

"NO QUESTIONS! Now drop and gimme over 9000 pushups!" Gill roared

"WHAT NINE THOUSAND?" The soldier jawdropped

**An hour later.**

"Ready?" Gill asked

"READY!" The soldiers shouted.

"3..2...1...LAUNCH THE STINK -A MAJIG! OF DOOM!" Gill yelled

And the hose sucked up the goo from Kazarina's tube and released a cloud of green gas.

"YEEEEAAAAH! " the coldiers cheered as the cloud floated into the dimension transporter and was transported to Neatha.

Meanwhile on Neathia...

The Brawlers and the Castle Knights were busy rebuilding their base. Everyone was loaded with bricks made of the Neathians' famous "Gelatin Crystals". Everything was going according to plan...Or was it?

"Guys, what's that? " Fabia ased, pointing at a menacing-looking green cloud that blocked out the sun"

"I don't know, but I don't like the looks of...AAAAARGH!" Dan started turning blue and eventually collapsed to the ground with X's over his eyes.

So did everyone else.

In a split second everyone was out cold. Without Drago's Element the Second Shield began to fade away. It seemed like the Gundalians had won.

But the Sacred Orb himself couldn't stand the stench and self-destructed, destroying the universe in process.

THE END.

**Now that that's done, read and review! Pwetty pweeease! *puppydog eyes***


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